Robert Langenegger

Recipe for life in Corona times

The current pandemic situation has made me be more deliberate in my actions. Having said that, I would like to acknowledge and promote my seemingly foolproof method of navigating the scenario. Basically it all boils down to the simple recipe of adding monosodium glutamate (MSG) to everything. I heard that MSG is actually safer than salt because it lessens your intake of the latter without sacrificing flavor. Anything mundane such as a fried egg or a sachet of sardines can be fortified with a committed dousing  of MSG. I’ve been known to use MSG on fruits such as avocados and pomelo. Heck, I even have been seen emptying a packet of MSG in my drinking water. That’s how integral it is to my survival. Judgement aside I would say that it’s never too early to instill  onto the next generation the virtues of msg. I see no harm in adding a  pinch of monosodium in pre-pumped breastmilk to give the child a little edge in life. What’s the matter in adding half a teaspoon of msg in the child’s 6 ounces of formula? The math is correct but the hearts of humanity have not yet come to terms with the evolution of taste. There have been actual studies in certain prefectures that dolphins not only have certain emotions that humans have no words for but they actually have particular flavors associated with these emotions one of which is MSG. Legend has it that the flavor of MSG was derived in ancient Japan from the tears of a bull dolphin that was beached while trying to save his pod from a shark attack. Thus this tale inspires me to concoct a recipe for revenge that serves 2-4 people. I thought that the only fitting solution would be to sauté all the ginger and chili spices first before adding the broth. Then once this is boiling you can add the shark’s fin followed by the bamboo shoots. Reduce the heat to a gentle simmer for a couple of minutes till the meat falls of the cartilage. Finally just before serving add 5 heaping tablespoons of MSG to finish off this wonderful delicacy. Bon appetit.